The question is multi-faceted and for each person/couple that decides to adopt the reason will vary. Both my wife & I are over 40, married for the first and last time and understand the reality of aging eggs and the "challenges" of fertility issues. Politically correct enough, don't worry I am not but I gotta pull you into this tale somehow.
ADOPTION in The Vocabulary
Yep he is a state licensed engineer.
My glib reply was yeah if we produce an ugly looking child I am all in for adoption. After all we live in the city where plastic surgery was perfected LA-LA-Land. Adoption is a two way street. For me adoption was definitely in my vocabulary. During the end of the roaring '60's mom was on a hotline for women who thought they might be preggers and didn't know what to do. We took care of a friends child during the day since the child was 3 days old. Not quite adoption but for our family this child turned up to be considered our sister. She had two sets of parents and two sets of siblings.
As in The Warner Brothers and Their Sister Dot cartoon – She is a state licensed Nurse.
The wife, on the other hand, had adoption placed in her heart at an early age. During the summers she would stay with her grandparents. One day her grand mother asked her to tell her about her dolls. She went on to tell her that one doll was a owner and manager of a large corporation, somewhat similar to her grandmother, another a banker and her adopted daughter was a doctor. This out of a girl at the age of 8. When asked where the child was from she said
Rubber meets the Road
Three years into the marriage we were well onto our way to determining just how committed we were to the concept of adoption. Fertility issues were in full bloom. Suffice it to say that when our out of pocket expenses hit over $15,000 the plug was pulled. Dang we could have adopted and been parents at the end of the year and few months of probing poking drugs and false starts. Now it is time to start looking seriously into the adoption route, more on that later. Of course a few months later we are pregnant and the adoption plans are put on hold. A year later I am asked if we can still adopt and I say yeah. Little do I know she is pregnant, little does she know. We start to whittle down adoption agencies, make our choice and voila, congratulations in 9 months you will have another child. We talk to our adoption agency and they say no problem so the ball is rolling.
Recently our child has been identified and she will be the middle child.
What this is NOT
So due to disclosure rules, signed a contract a bunch of this may be generic but it is definitely a ride. Once you sign a contract you are pregnant on paper and the gestation time can be anywhere from 1 year to 3 years depending on the country you adopt from. The information here is really just a story. Not sure if I can even tell you what agency we are using as we are still in the process of the adoption. I will link you to some of the sites we have used and probably tell you why we did not go with one agency over another.
The Not List
Not – a great resource site
Not – a non biased look at adoption, defeats the purpose of blogging
Not - gonna name names
The Will List
Will – let you see the hoops and barriers that we have had to overcome
Will – let you see the fun use of your $$, yep sometimes it is our government at work
Will - sequence events as they have happened
Will – have run on sentences, some poorly structured paragraphs
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